theinnkeeperlibrarian:

leepacey:

a restaurant in my hometown got a review that said the servers should “show some skin” so the owner added a potato skin special to the menu and all the proceeds from the special go to the west virginia foundation for rape information services (x)

That’s exactly the appropriate response.

(via deatheatersarereal)

imperfect000000:

When you wake up and get your period and you’re like “oh that’s why I was crying uncontrollably last night over a jelly bean”

(via i-peed-so-hard-i-laughed)

loudmouthed:

WHY would you want weed socks where you gonna wear those?? to church???? to school? to work? no you’ll wear them at home by yourself and take pics of them for the internet bc there’s little marijuanas on them

(via distraction)

enlargers:

"can i ask you something?" my immediate reply says “go for it" but my mind has already gone through the seven stages of grief

(via wrong-page)

fruitcrocs:

fruitcrocs:

i love it when i cook stuff for myself bc like i’ve just cooked pasta and yee bitch look at me providing for myself i could totally make it in this world it’s almost as if i have my life together

i take this back the pasta was shit i’m falling apart

(via wrong-page)

emmysaurus:

taking a nap is always so risky like when will I wake up? in thirty minutes? in 2 hours? in 7 years?? no one can be sure

(via deatheatersarereal)

trapcartel:

If you make a girl feel bad about her body u a bitch

(Source: elijahfanblog, via zackisontumblr)

carryonmy-assbutt:

rose-for-a-tenner:

carryonmy-assbutt:

guys what do hostages do if they have to pee really badly

like do the bad guys let you have toilet breaks or escort you to the loo

My cousin was held for 36 hours by the Gulf cartel. He said they were pretty chill about bathroom breaks.

I want more to that story

(via wrong-page)